Dear Diary,

HEY>>>>!!!!!!!!!!

I am Back.

Back from a bunch of rainy days in Key West.... It was sunny like one day, and i got semi-burned that day too..lol

Anyway, I got certified as a Scuba Diver, which is cool I guess. I am dreading the dull, slow pace of the life i left on vacation. I can just feel time-crawling by in the days to come. I am very ambitious and I have a ton of ideas racing through my head, but ya know how , when your not doing anything; it's just easier to keep not doing anything....lol I did apply for a bunch of jobs, and no one has called me back, which is pretty depressing, but then again, most of them weren't "really" hiring at the moment anyway, but I know they'd probably hire me if they were. Vacation was fun though. Restricting didn't go well. We ate out SO many times, and I ate stuff, cause i knew we were gonna be eating like that, and that i would just despise my vacation if I tried to restrict. Plus, my parents get annoyed if i don't eat with them. It's so funny. They get mad when i don't eat with them, but not mad cause i'm not eating--THey get mad cause they think I am just being a big brat or something, and that I am just being difficult! How ironic. My family is seriously f**ed up in a lot of ways. My sister is like one jump away from being able to LITerally walk on water, my dad seriously hates his job, but says he doen't have $ to do what he really wants, yet he buys useless things left and right and tries to tell me how to live my life, & my mom, ugh...she's just a walking time-bomb that constantly yells/or cries/ at me 24/7!! She's Always on my case about something. Meanwhile, I am just the semi-sane one trying to get up and get the fuck out in some way or another.

Well, they are..not ..ALL that bad, but mostly they are..lol

Well, restricted today...I didn't completely lose my mind over vacation. I still desperately gotta lose weight. Needless to say though, I didn't GAIN any weight over vacation which is astronomically astounding, but incrediblly good. I did stop taking birth control too. I didn't mean to, but i forgot the pills on vacation, so after you screw up 9 days, your pretty much screwed all up. So I just quit. I didn't wanna go back for that visit anyway. I guess I'll stay off it for a while since I'm not having sex anyway :(

I do wanna look into some of the other things though for next time. I am hoping that I'll lose an easy 5 lbs. just for getting off it because lots of people say they lose about 5 lbs. when they get off it or switch to something else.

Well, I restricted today to 220 calories pretty easily, and i think i am gonna do that indefinately until i reach my goal weight. I am really motivated now because of my b/day coming up,and i just pigged out over vacation, and i am tired of eating if you can believe it. so hopefull good things will come soon...